By Patwant Kaur
Photo: Camila Muradas
It’s easy to get distracted, confused. We are pressured by external stimulation, social and family pressure. For many people, it is difficult to live with their own company. I know people who barely leave one relationship and start another. They are guided by an agenda full of commitments and do not support the idea of being with themselves and away from the noise. When they are not on the internet, they need to be surrounded by people in different places. More important than enjoying the present moment, the state of feeling, is being in the photo.
I noticed that most people are looking for the satisfaction of desires in things, people, seeking out of themselves what can only be found within the person. It lacks the courage and authenticity to act in another way and understand how good the meeting with our own company can be. Until we are able to have this understanding, it is difficult to access self love, forgiveness and healing to continue the journey of life safely.
When the person does not have a good connection with herself, with her identity, this external confusion also interferes in relationships. In general, both friendships and loves happen by the need to satisfy needs, not by the appreciation of the other for what he/she is. Relationships become poor because it is not possible to have an authentic relationship with the partner, as long as we are not able to establish a legitimate and true coexistence with ourselves.
We live in the illusion of wanting, that is created by the mind, which thinks it needs all these things. We are addicted to thinking and this compulsion makes us unable to access our deepest feelings, turn our attention to the body and find peace. We judge the present with the eyes of past experiences. We suffer from situations that have not yet happened and consequently we accumulate stress and unhappiness. This is the pattern of the majority. It is known to be among the chickens and to do what they do, to scratch.
The good part in this story is that there is an alternative way to this direction. A path with more connection where it is possible to stop and listen to the heart, the body and the breath. When we reach this learning that is the principle of meditation, we gain presence and the altitude of the eagles that fly from above. In this neutral place of the mind, it is possible to observe “I” with a macro, loving vision and to exercise self-forgiveness. In this place, we find comfort and fullness. We understand that everything, situations and people that are in our life have a purpose and learning. We become compassionate, grateful for life.
I believe that transformative actions like stopping complaining, competing, and comparing can accelerate the flight of the eagles. When we are distracted in drama, blaming the other for our misfortune, it is difficult to see opportunities and see the beauty that exists in each moment. Our lives are the result of our ability to express good energies, words or to live drowned in our own misery. The chickens do not leave the ground, while the eagles fly high to reach their destination.